Escorts and emotional boundaries!

When working as an escort your safety always comes first. And when we say safety, we mean both physical and emotional safety, and you can accomplish that only by setting up the right boundaries between you as an escort and your clients.

We all know, or at least should know, about how to maintain our physical safety when it comes to dealing with a client, starting with a proper screening, and continuing with meeting him in a familiar place, communicating the details of our encounter to a friend (time, place and so on), staying away from alcohol, keeping the details of our personal life private, having a different escort persona – escort name, special escort phone, a story created to fit our personality.

But when it comes to emotional safety, this is where things tend to get more complicated, especially when we don’t have a good example of healthy emotional interactions in our personal life.

But knowing how to set emotional boundaries is vital for our wellbeing, especially when working as an escort, a “job” that requires a lot of human interaction that is energy draining.

Each with his emotions

Try not to let yourself be influenced by the way your date is feeling. If he is sad, angry, overly excited, try not to copy his behavior and let yourself be influenced by it, instead try to remind yourself that what he’s feeling is not what you are feeling, and his emotions have nothing to do with you. Try not to take on his negative emotions.

Your needs come first

If you feel too drained, or you just feel like taking some time to yourself, put your needs first. Try to postpone your next date or refuse to prolong the date by an extra hour if your date is asking you to but you simply don’t feel like doing so. Refuse that extra drink, say a clear “no” when something is making you feel uncomfortable. Even if you will end up losing a client, you will gain something more – your emotional health!

Your time is your own

You don’t owe anyone anything, so be clear with your time commitment. If you have a no bookings on the weekend policy, or no bookings after 8 pm, make this a rule no matter how much a client may insist on you to change it. Your time is precious, so do not allow anyone to take advantage of your free time or use your time for freebies.

Their emotions are not your responsibility

The way your dates are feeling is not your responsibility, keep that in mind and do not let yourself be influenced by it. You are not anyone’s mother, girlfriend, or wife, you are not here for anyone to dump their negativity or bad emotions, and you are not obligated to accept their emotional burden. Remind yourself what your role is as an escort and stick to it. You can make small talk, listen to their problems, but don’t make this your job. Protect your own emotional integrity by setting up clear boundaries and by making them clear for everyone to know.

Have a life outside escorting

Being an escort is a job, keep that in mind! Focus on creating a rich personal life for yourself, a life that fulfills your needs and makes you find peace and tranquility. Create a clear boundary between your escort life and your personal life and try not to accept calls from clients or think about work during your personal time. This time must be dedicated to your own needs, your pleasures, and hobbies. This way you can be fully charged and invested during your dates with your clients.  

When talking about emotional boundaries you must think of all the things that are making you feel emotionally uncomfortable and set some rules according to that. Do not treat your emotional safety lightly because when mentally you are not feeling ok, your daily life suffers.